Somewhere in the internet, November, 2007
[01:13] ***airbarian has entered the chat
[01:13] airbarian: You guys will never believe what I just saw on the news.
[01:13] bomber756: Apocalypse. Armageddon.
[01:13] ChairLegg: O.J. Simpson found the real killers.
[01:13] Qeronimo: Shrub declared martial law.
[01:13] ChairLegg: LOL
[01:13] ChairLegg: The end of pizza delivery as we know it.
[01:14] airbarian: Charles Travis fucking Villette.
[01:14] Qeronimo: ...
[01:14] ChairLegg: Chaz? Finally got himself killed?
[01:14] Qeronimo: Ouch.
[01:15] bomber756: What, he didn't make a crater years ago? He fell off the face of the planet--what, 2004? 2005?
[01:15] bomber756: I figured the body just hadn't turned up yet.
[01:16] Qeronimo: *checks the splat file for an obit*
[01:16] airbarian: Waste of keystrokes. Alive and well.
[01:16] airbarian: Get this.
[01:16] airbarian: He's a *Fed.*
[01:17] Qeronimo: ...!!!
[01:17] bomber756: You shit me.
[01:17] ChairLegg: That cannot have been Chaz.
[01:18] airbarian: Are there two people on the planet who look like Screamer?
[01:18] airbarian: I think not.
[01:18] Qeronimo: ...
[01:18] bomber756: You keep typing that ellipsis. I do not think it means what you think it means.
[01:18] Qeronimo: 0.o o.0
[01:18] bomber756: ...better.
[01:18] ChairLegg: By "Fed" you mean?
[01:19] airbarian: He was wearing a blue windbreaker that said F.B.I. across the shoulders, what do you think I mean?
[01:19] airbarian: And before you ask, yes, no shit.
[01:19] ChairLegg: ...shit.
[01:19] ChairLegg: We could have been... so very busted.
[01:19] airbarian: The words have not been invented to express how busted we could have been.
[01:19] Qeronimo: Well, shit. I figured that motherfucker would be a hole in the pavement by now.
[01:19] Qeronimo: He was one crazy asshole.
[01:21] ChairLegg: Bombs? You still there?
[01:22] bomber756: Don't mind me, man.
[01:22] bomber756: I'm just meditating on the nature of the universe, and the truth of the koan that God is an iron.
© 2007-2008 Emma Bull, Elizabeth Bear, Sarah Monette & Will Shetterly.
Artwork © Amanda Downum.